Антон Чехов
Uncle Vanya: Scenes from Country Life in Four Acts
VOITSKI. Hold on! Repeat what you just said; I don't think I heard you quite right.
SEREBRAKOFF. I said we would invest the money in bonds and buy a cottage in Finland with the surplus.
VOITSKI. No, not Finland – you said something else.
SEREBRAKOFF. I propose to sell this place.
VOITSKI. Aha! That was it! So you are going to sell the place? Splendid. The idea is a rich one. And what do you propose to do with my old mother and me and with Sonia here?
SEREBRAKOFF. That will be decided in due time. We can't do everything at once.
VOITSKI. Wait! It is clear that until this moment I have never had a grain of sense in my head. I have always been stupid enough to think that the estate belonged to Sonia. My father bought it as a wedding present for my sister, and I foolishly imagined that as our laws were made for Russians and not Turks, my sister's estate would come down to her child.
SEREBRAKOFF. Of course it is Sonia's. Has any one denied it? I don't want to sell it without Sonia's consent; on the contrary, what I am doing is for Sonia's good.
VOITSKI. This is absolutely incomprehensible. Either I have gone mad or – or —
MME. VOITSKAYA. Jean, don't contradict Alexander. Trust to him; he knows better than we do what is right and what is wrong.
VOITSKI. I shan't. Give me some water. [He drinks] Go ahead! Say anything you please – anything!
SEREBRAKOFF. I can't imagine why you are so upset. I don't pretend that my scheme is an ideal one, and if you all object to it I shall not insist. [A pause.]
TELEGIN. [With embarrassment] I not only nourish feelings of respect toward learning, your Excellency, but I am also drawn to it by family ties. My brother Gregory's wife's brother, whom you may know; his name is Constantine Lakedemonoff, and he used to be a magistrate —
VOITSKI. Stop, Waffles. This is business; wait a bit, we will talk of that later. [To SEREBRAKOFF] There now, ask him what he thinks; this estate was bought from his uncle.
SEREBRAKOFF. Ah! Why should I ask questions? What good would it do?
VOITSKI. The price was ninety-five thousand roubles. My father paid seventy and left a debt of twenty-five. Now listen! This place could never have been bought had I not renounced my inheritance in favour of my sister, whom I deeply loved – and what is more, I worked for ten years like an ox, and paid off the debt.
SEREBRAKOFF. I regret ever having started this conversation.
VOITSKI. Thanks entirely to my own personal efforts, the place is entirely clear of debts, and now, when I have grown old, you want to throw me out, neck and crop!
SEREBRAKOFF. I can't imagine what you are driving at.
VOITSKI. For twenty-five years I have managed this place, and have sent you the returns from it like the most honest of servants, and you have never given me one single word of thanks for my work, not one – neither in my youth nor now. You allowed me a meagre salary of five hundred roubles a year, a beggar's pittance, and have never even thought of adding a rouble to it.
SEREBRAKOFF. What did I know about such things, Ivan? I am not a practical man and don't understand them. You might have helped yourself to all you wanted.
VOITSKI. Yes, why did I not steal? Don't you all despise me for not stealing, when it would have been only justice? And I should not now have been a beggar!
MME. VOITSKAYA. [Sternly] Jean!
TELEGIN. [Agitated] Vanya, old man, don't talk in that way. Why spoil such pleasant relations? [He embraces him] Do stop!
VOITSKI. For twenty-five years I have been sitting here with my mother like a mole in a burrow. Our every thought and hope was yours and yours only. By day we talked with pride of you and your work, and spoke your name with veneration; our nights we wasted reading the books and papers which my soul now loathes.
TELEGIN. Don't, Vanya, don't. I can't stand it.
SEREBRAKOFF. [Wrathfully] What under heaven do you want, anyway?
VOITSKI. We used to think of you as almost superhuman, but now the scales have fallen from my eyes and I see you as you are! You write on art without knowing anything about it. Those books of yours which I used to admire are not worth one copper kopeck. You are a hoax!
SEREBRAKOFF. Can't any one make him stop? I am going!
HELENA. Ivan, I command you to stop this instant! Do you hear me?
VOITSKI. I refuse! [SEREBRAKOFF tries to get out of the room, but VOITSKI bars the door] Wait! I have not done yet! You have wrecked my life. I have never lived. My best years have gone for nothing, have been ruined, thanks to you. You are my most bitter enemy!
TELEGIN. I can't stand it; I can't stand it. I am going. [He goes out in great excitement.]
SEREBRAKOFF. But what do you want? What earthly right have you to use such language to me? Ruination! If this estate is yours, then take it, and let me be ruined!
HELENA. I am going away out of this hell this minute. [Shrieks] This is too much!
VOITSKI. My life has been a failure. I am clever and brave and strong. If I had lived a normal life I might have become another Schopenhauer or Dostoieffski. I am losing my head! I am going crazy! Mother, I am in despair! Oh, mother!
MME. VOITSKAYA. [Sternly] Listen, Alexander!
SONIA falls on her knees beside the nurse and nestles against her.
SONIA. Oh, nurse, nurse!
VOITSKI. Mother! What shall I do? But no, don't speak! I know what to do. [To SEREBRAKOFF] And you will understand me!
He goes out through the door in the centre of the room and MME. VOITSKAYA follows him.
SEREBRAKOFF. Tell me, what on earth is the matter? Take this lunatic out of my sight! I cannot possibly live under the same roof with him. His room [He points to the centre door] is almost next door to mine. Let him take himself off into the village or into the wing of the house, or I shall leave here at once. I cannot stay in the same house with him.
HELENA. [To her husband] We are leaving to-day; we must get ready at once for our departure.
SEREBRAKOFF. What a perfectly dreadful man!
SONIA. [On her knees beside the nurse and turning to her father. She speaks with emotion] You must be kind to us, papa. Uncle Vanya and I are so unhappy! [Controlling her despair] Have pity on us. Remember how Uncle Vanya and Granny used to copy and translate your books for you every night – every, every night. Uncle Vanya has toiled without rest; he would never spend a penny on us, we sent it all to you. We have not eaten the bread of idleness. I am not saying this as I should like to, but you must understand us, papa, you must be merciful to us.
HELENA. [Very excited, to her husband] For heaven's sake, Alexander, go and have a talk with him – explain!
SEREBRAKOFF. Very well, I shall have a talk with him, but I won't apologise for a thing. I am not angry with him, but you must confess that his behaviour has been strange, to say the least. Excuse me, I shall go to him.
[He goes out through the centre door.]
HELENA. Be gentle with him; try to quiet him. [She follows him out.]
SONIA. [Nestling nearer to MARINA] Nurse, oh, nurse!
MARINA. It's all right, my baby. When the geese have cackled they will be still again. First they cackle and then they stop.
SONIA. Nurse!
MARINA. You are trembling all over, as if you were freezing. There, there, little orphan baby, God is merciful. A little linden-tea, and it will all pass away. Don't cry, my sweetest. [Looking angrily at the door in the centre of the room] See, the geese have all gone now. The devil take them!
A shot is heard. HELENA screams behind the scenes. SONIA shudders.
MARINA. Bang! What's that?
SEREBRAKOFF. [Comes in reeling with terror] Hold him! hold him! He has gone mad!
HELENA and VOITSKI are seen struggling in the doorway.
HELENA. [Trying to wrest the revolver from him] Give it to me; give it to me, I tell you!
VOITSKI. Let me go, Helena, let me go! [He frees himself and rushes in, looking everywhere for SEREBRAKOFF] Where is he? Ah, there he is! [He shoots at him. A pause] I didn't get him? I missed again? [Furiously] Damnation! Damnation! To hell with him!
He flings the revolver on the floor, and drops helpless into a chair. SEREBRAKOFF stands as if stupefied. HELENA leans against the wall, almost fainting.
HELENA. Take me away! Take me away! I can't stay here – I can't!
VOITSKI. [In despair] Oh, what shall I do? What shall I do?
SONIA. [Softly] Oh, nurse, nurse!
The curtain falls
ACT IV
VOITSKI'S bedroom, which is also his office. A table stands near the window; on it are ledgers, letter scales, and papers of every description. Near by stands a smaller table belonging to ASTROFF, with his paints and drawing materials. On the wall hangs a cage containing a starling. There is also a map of Africa on the wall, obviously of no use to anybody. There is a large sofa covered with buckram. A door to the left leads into an inner room; one to the right leads into the front hall, and before this door lies a mat for the peasants with their muddy boots to stand on. It is an autumn evening. The silence is profound. TELEGIN and MARINA are sitting facing one another, winding wool.
TELEGIN. Be quick, Marina, or we shall be called away to say good-bye before you have finished. The carriage has already been ordered.
MARINA. [Trying to wind more quickly] I am a little tired.
TELEGIN. They are going to Kharkoff to live.
MARINA. They do well to go.
TELEGIN. They have been frightened. The professor's wife won't stay here an hour longer. "If we are going at all, let's be off," says she, "we shall go to Kharkoff and look about us, and then we can send for our things." They are travelling light. It seems, Marina, that fate has decreed for them not to live here.
MARINA. And quite rightly. What a storm they have just raised! It was shameful!
TELEGIN. It was indeed. The scene was worthy of the brush of Aibazofski.
MARINA. I wish I'd never laid eyes on them. [A pause] Now we shall have things as they were again: tea at eight, dinner at one, and supper in the evening; everything in order as decent folks, as Christians like to have it. [Sighs] It is a long time since I have eaten noodles.
TELEGIN. Yes, we haven't had noodles for ages. [A pause] Not for ages. As I was going through the village this morning, Marina, one of the shop-keepers called after me, "Hi! you hanger-on!" I felt it bitterly.
MARINA. Don't pay the least attention to them, master; we are all dependents on God. You and Sonia and all of us. Every one must work, no one can sit idle. Where is Sonia?
TELEGIN. In the garden with the doctor, looking for Ivan. They fear he may lay violent hands on himself.
MARINA. Where is his pistol?
TELEGIN. [Whispers] I hid it in the cellar.
VOITSKI and ASTROFF come in.
VOITSKI. Leave me alone! [To MARINA and TELEGIN] Go away! Go away and leave me to myself, if but for an hour. I won't have you watching me like this!
TELEGIN. Yes, yes, Vanya. [He goes out on tiptoe.]
MARINA. The gander cackles; ho! ho! ho!
[She gathers up her wool and goes out.]
VOITSKI. Leave me by myself!
ASTROFF. I would, with the greatest pleasure. I ought to have gone long ago, but I shan't leave you until you have returned what you took from me.
VOITSKI. I took nothing from you.
ASTROFF. I am not jesting, don't detain me, I really must go.
VOITSKI. I took nothing of yours.
ASTROFF. You didn't? Very well, I shall have to wait a little longer, and then you will have to forgive me if I resort to force. We shall have to bind you and search you. I mean what I say.
VOITSKI. Do as you please. [A pause] Oh, to make such a fool of myself! To shoot twice and miss him both times! I shall never forgive myself.
ASTROFF. When the impulse came to shoot, it would have been as well had you put a bullet through your own head.
VOITSKI. [Shrugging his shoulders] Strange! I attempted murder, and am not going to be arrested or brought to trial. That means they think me mad. [With a bitter laugh] Me! I am mad, and those who hide their worthlessness, their dullness, their crying heartlessness behind a professor's mask, are sane! Those who marry old men and then deceive them under the noses of all, are sane! I saw you kiss her; I saw you in each other's arms!
ASTROFF. Yes, sir, I did kiss her; so there. [He puts his thumb to his nose.]
VOITSKI. [His eyes on the door] No, it is the earth that is mad, because she still bears us on her breast.
ASTROFF. That is nonsense.
VOITSKI. Well? Am I not a madman, and therefore irresponsible? Haven't I the right to talk nonsense?
ASTROFF. This is a farce! You are not mad; you are simply a ridiculous fool. I used to think every fool was out of his senses, but now I see that lack of sense is a man's normal state, and you are perfectly normal.
VOITSKI. [Covers his face with his hands] Oh! If you knew how ashamed I am! These piercing pangs of shame are like nothing on earth. [In an agonised voice] I can't endure them! [He leans against the table] What can I do? What can I do?
ASTROFF. Nothing.
VOITSKI. You must tell me something! Oh, my God! I am forty-seven years old. I may live to sixty; I still have thirteen years before me; an eternity! How shall I be able to endure life for thirteen years? What shall I do? How can I fill them? Oh, don't you see? [He presses ASTROFF'S hand convulsively] Don't you see, if only I could live the rest of my life in some new way! If I could only wake some still, bright morning and feel that life had begun again; that the past was forgotten and had vanished like smoke. [He weeps] Oh, to begin life anew! Tell me, tell me how to begin.
ASTROFF. [Crossly] What nonsense! What sort of a new life can you and I look forward to? We can have no hope.
VOITSKI. None?
ASTROFF. None. Of that I am convinced.
VOITSKI. Tell me what to do. [He puts his hand to his heart] I feel such a burning pain here.
ASTROFF. [Shouts angrily] Stop! [Then, more gently] It may be that posterity, which will despise us for our blind and stupid lives, will find some road to happiness; but we – you and I – have but one hope, the hope that we may be visited by visions, perhaps by pleasant ones, as we lie resting in our graves. [Sighing] Yes, brother, there were only two respectable, intelligent men in this county, you and I. Ten years or so of this life of ours, this miserable life, have sucked us under, and we have become as contemptible and petty as the rest. But don't try to talk me out of my purpose! Give me what you took from me, will you?
VOITSKI. I took nothing from you.
ASTROFF. You took a little bottle of morphine out of my medicine-case. [A pause] Listen! If you are positively determined to make an end to yourself, go into the woods and shoot yourself there. Give up the morphine, or there will be a lot of talk and guesswork; people will think I gave it to you. I don't fancy having to perform a post-mortem on you. Do you think I should find it interesting?
SONIA comes in.
VOITSKI. Leave me alone.
ASTROFF. [To SONIA] Sonia, your uncle has stolen a bottle of morphine out of my medicine-case and won't give it up. Tell him that his behaviour is – well, unwise. I haven't time, I must be going.
SONIA. Uncle Vanya, did you take the morphine?
ASTROFF. Yes, he took it. [A pause] I am absolutely sure.
SONIA. Give it up! Why do you want to frighten us? [Tenderly] Give it up, Uncle Vanya! My misfortune is perhaps even greater than yours, but I am not plunged in despair. I endure my sorrow, and shall endure it until my life comes to a natural end. You must endure yours, too. [A pause] Give it up! Dear, darling Uncle Vanya. Give it up! [She weeps] You are so good, I am sure you will have pity on us and give it up. You must endure your sorrow, Uncle Vanya; you must endure it.
VOITSKI takes a bottle from the drawer of the table and hands it to ASTROFF.
VOITSKI. There it is! [To SONIA] And now, we must get to work at once; we must do something, or else I shall not be able to endure it.
SONIA. Yes, yes, to work! As soon as we have seen them off we shall go to work. [She nervously straightens out the papers on the table] Everything is in a muddle!
ASTROFF. [Putting the bottle in his case, which he straps together] Now I can be off.
HELENA comes in.
HELENA. Are you here, Ivan? We are starting in a moment. Go to Alexander, he wants to speak to you.
